Forbidden
by Hockeywife
Summary: Dawn Jennings has been hired by the Vancouver Canucks as their newest athletic therapist, much to the delight of many Canucks. One in particular being Ryan Kesler. She is engaged to Toronto Blue Jay Brett Lawrie. What happens when the forbidden is so tempting?
1. Chapter 1

Of all of the NHL teams in the league she had to walk into mine. Or something like that. I can still remember walking into the trainers room the smell of Aqua Sonic gel and athletic tape. Wait...does athletic tape smell? Never mind. She was gorgeous. Her shaggy blonde bob framed her face that had luscious pink lips that even Crosby would be jealous of. Blue green eyes that looked like the pacific behind tortoiseshell frames that looked adorable on her. Fitting as we were in Vancouver. Kind of like a blonde Angelina Jolie, no that's exactly what she looked like. She wore a retro Yellow Canucks T shirt and black yoga pants. Thank God for yoga pants, it gave me the perfect angle to check out her ass. She had a bubble butt and it fit in those damn pants perfectly. Her yellow Tshirt didn't show any cleavage but you could still see two sizeable mounds in her shirt.

She just happened to be buried in David Booth's crotch stretching out his ligaments giving a deep tissue massage. Damn why did he get to have the groin injury? He wouldn't know what to do with a girl like that. Mr. Holier than Thou would likely take her mini golfing or something equally gooberish like that.

"Kes, you're early" she speaks! Words come out of those beautiful lips flowing effortlessly. She looked down at her watch. "Give me five minutes I can do you next" she said with a smile. 'Oh I bet you will baby' I thought getting up on the table next to Boothy leaning against the cold wall. "I'm Dawn by the way" she said extending a small delicate hand to me. "I'm your new athletic therapist." She said smiling. Hmm, I wouldn't mind waking waking up at the crack of Dawn everyday.

"Ryan Kesler, but you seem to know that already" I said with a smile as she turned to walk into the office to grab my chart. I turned to Boothy speaking low so she couldn't hear me. "Hey Boothy, you might want to wear a cup next rubdown." I said nodding at his crotch.

"Screw off Kes," he said throwing a ball of athletic tape at me. "Besides I'm pretty sure she's engaged." He added. "Check out the rock on her left hand when she's back" he said lifting up his left hand.

"She's engaged. Not dead" I said laughing at Boothy. So naive. She entered with two neuromodilation devices.

"Ok Davey, lay back I have to put this on you." She said grabbing some aqua sonic to put on the pads of the machine. "Roll your shorts up." She said as a shy Boothy rolled the leg of his shorts up so that they were likely giving him a bad wedgie. She squirted some gel onto the pads. "This is going to be cold. And just so you know I always do this two men deep for your protection and mine." She said placing the pads on his groin region.

.bastard, two more inches and she'd be touching his junk. "You gonna buy him dinner first Dawn?" I cracked a joke making a little giggle come from her throat.

"Ok Mr. Big shot." She said with a laugh. "Let's have a look at the shoulder." Boothy looked very relieved that she wasn't touching him anymore. He was likely steps from jizzing his pants. She wheeled the ultrasound machine over as I took off my shirt.

"So Dawn, you joining us permanently?" I asked her as she rubbed the wand over my muscles. It was going to be hard to concentrate.

"For now." She said non commitally not looking up from her work. "Head forward you're tensing." She said.

"Oh sorry." I was hoping that she wouldn't catch me. "Is this your first sports job?" I genuinely was curious about her.

"First paying one yes." She said continuing. "Went to school in Toronto at Sheridan college. Interned with the Blue Jays and then graduated." She added.

"So how'd you end up here with us." I asked her turning my head again catching a look at her rather large emerald cut diamond engagement ring with diamonds around it, what's that called pave? I don't know.

"Kes if you don't keep your eyes front I'm going to have to steal you down to the table." She said laughing. Oh yes, daddy like was the first thing to come to mind.

"Sorry." I said again. "So you were saying?"

"Well my fiancé lives in Vancouver in the offseason." She said. Offseason? Clearly she likes athletes. Another bonus.

"Offseason?" I asked her curiously as she put the wand down beginning to deeply massage my shoulder tissue. "Is he an athlete?"

"Yeah. You could say that" I could tell she was smiling. "We met while I was treating his ankle injury." She added with what sounded like a smile in her voice.

"Anybody I would know?" I asked her. Damn she had strong hands for a girl. They'd feel even better around my cock. Hmm...note to self, get groin injury!

"Brett Lawrie." She said wiping off my shoulder with a towel before placing the neuromodulator on the shoulder giving me the controls. "3rd baseman for the Blue Jays." She said with a smile. "And big Canucks fan" she added.

"Oh yeah, he's the one who's a bit of a hot head right?" I said teasing her. He had two full sleeve tattoos and had the reputation of being thrown out of games from time to time.

"He's been known to be ejected from time to time yes." She said not taking the bait and just laughing it off. "Honestly, I think it's kind of hot." She said with a smile.

"Eh Boothy, remind me to get into a fight tonight." I said to my friend giving a wink her way. At least one thing I knew so far, she wasn't against fraternizing with the players seeing as during her time with the Jays she met her current fiancé.

"Not if I don't get into one first" he laughed taking the towel from Dawn to clean himself off from the gel.

"Ok boys, get your asses out of here." She said smiling throwing the dirty towels in the bin. Yep, I was definitely going to like her.

‹ Summary


	2. Chapter 2

======  
Take me on a trip, I'd like to go some day.  
Take me to New York, I'd love to see LA.  
I really want to come kick it with you.  
You'll be my American boy.  
======

Dawn rolled up to Vancouver International Airport with her fiancé in tow in their black Acura ZDX. Rap music was streaming from the subwoofers. Bass pounding, beats thumping. They got out in the unloading zone together as the noise from the music came to a stop. He opened the trunk to get her bags out for her. At least he was a gentleman. He could've just popped the trunk for her and sent her on her way. His backwards hat and heavily tatted arms made him look like a bit of a tool, but hey ink means different things to different people. Suddenly he kissed her full on the mouth in front of everyone. I didn't want to eavesdrop but it was the most interesting scene going on at the passenger drop off as the team was massing together to get on the flight to San Jose. I saw him pull a white bandage off of a piece around his left finger. Must be some new ink. Her name perhaps? She smiled, gave him another kiss and a hug. He grabbed her ass as he hugged her. "Classy" I said under my breath. Sarcastically of course. But who was I to judge? If I had an ass like that leaving me I would probably do the same.

Finally after saying their last goodbyes she entered the airport.

"Hey Dawnie." I said in a mock New Yorker stereotypical accent. Much like my father has. "You ready for your first roadie with the boys?" I asked her as she put her luggage with the rest of the team's ready for the group check in.

"A little nervous." She said smiling her blue eyes twinkling. "I think Brett is even more so." She added with a giggle.

"Oh right, that was him?" I asked non chalantly.

"That was him." She said smiling. "He's not used to me leaving him just the other way around." She added.

"He's got an awful lot of ink on him." I said my forehead scrunching up together.

"Really? I hadn't noticed" she said jokingly with a grin. "He got a new one yesterday. My name around his left ring finger." She said wistfully.

So called it. Score one for Higgy. "No offence, but isn't that a little premature or bad luck?" I asked her scratching my head.

"I think it's sweet" she said with a smile. "And special"

"Didn't you tell me he did that for another girl he was engaged to?" I asked. "Is that like a Canadian thing?"

"Oh what's this Higgy?" She said to me she said pretending she was having difficulty getting her hand out of her pocket and flashed me her middle finger.

"Oooh ouch!" I said grabbing my heart pretending like I've been shot.

"Come on American Boy. We've got a plane to catch." She said with a smile.

On the plane I sat beside her. It was a short flight, not even two hours. But the chance to sit with her was good enough for me.

"So is it hard being a woman in a mans world?" I asked her.

"In general or in the sports world?" She asked pushing her hot pink beats headphones off of her head around her neck.

"In sports of course" I laughed at her smiling my most charming, debonair smile.

"Well you've got to be tough." She said with a smile. "Or just learn to bat your eyes and play dumb" she added. She didn't seem like the type to play dumb. She had a tough personality but seemed like she could be sweet too. I've definitely already seen hints of that sweetness. "It definitely is a boys club" she added. "I've already been told I will likely spend most of my time in the trainer's room at the ready in case you guys get injured. Almost no way I'll see any action on the bench." She said her eyes downcast.

"Aww honey. I'm sorry to hear that" I said placing a hand over hers squeezing it. At first I thought it was too much. Perhaps a step too far. But she looked up into my eyes and said a very quiet thank you squeezing my hand back.

"So we're going to your turf in a few weeks" she said to me with a smile. "That's got to be exciting for you." She added with a grin.

"Yeah, first time on home turf as a 'Nuck." I said with a silly grin on my face.

"I've never been to NYC." She said. "Would you be my American Boy and show me around?" She asked her eyelashes fluttering slightly.

Was she flirting with me? Or was this some sort of joke? I was going to have to tell Kes this one. The guy had a huge hard on for Dawn. Every chance he got he hung around the trainer's office. Sometimes it seemed like he even faked injuries to get her attention.

"Absolutely." I said to her with another panty dropping smile. "So I have to ask, what happens when spring training starts?"

"What do you mean what happens then? He reports and I stay here until the end of the season." She said firmly.

"How do you guys decide on a date for a wedding?"

"We're getting married during the Allstar break." She said. "His not ours. And then we will have a delayed honeymoon and do it during our Allstar break next winter." She said with a smile.

"Sounds...complicated. I just know if I had a girl like you I wouldn't want to leave her with a pack of 30 other guys." I said with a wink.

"Dude. She's engaged." Kes said giving me a slap upside the head. "Even I couldn't change her mind." He said with a smile. "Yet" he added with a wink.

-  
Kes' POV

I knew exactly what Higgy was trying to do. And I'll be damned if I wasn't going to cockblock as much as I could. After all, I saw her first. Well actually Boothy did but he sure wouldn't know what to do with a girl like that. Her body built for sin and I'd take that sin again and again and again.

"Are you guys usually this friendly to the help ?" She asked me at dinner that night.

"Oh yeah," I said. "It's just a part of being with the team" I gave her my biggest smile possible as I opened the restaurant door for her.

"Hmm, I'll have to ask Mike how many quiet, intimate Italian eateries you've taken him to tomorrow." She said with a smirk. We sat down at a quiet, candlelit table. I couldn't have asked for a better spot to charm and seduce her.

"So, what do you think so far?" I asked her as the waiter poured us some water.

"Well I'm definitely feeling the love." She said with a big, toothy smile.

"And caaaaannn you feeeel the loooove tonight." I sang to her with a laugh. She laughed too clearly appreciating the song. "I should've been a popstar."

"Don't quit your day job Kes." She said smiling then taking a sip of water wrapping those beautiful lips around the lip of the glass. Damn that glass was lucky right now!

I entertained her with stories about growing up in Livonia, practical jokes played between myself and Bieksa, what it's like to be in the Stanley cup playoffs, she listened intently and hung on my every word.

"And then I got married, had a couple of kids and here we are." I said finishing my plate of chicken parm. My pocket buzzed. "Speaking of married" I said taking my phone out of my pocket. "Hello Andrea, yeah I'm out to dinner can I call you later? I know hon I'm sorry I didn't call when we got here. Yeah...yep...mmmhmmm...love you too babe." And I hung up quite relieved. "Sorry, the wife gets worried when I don't check in" I said putting the phone down.

"That's sweet." She said to me "I noticed you didn't say who you were out to dinner with." She said seductively sipping her wine.

"In this case, a little innocent fun can't hurt her." I said raising a glass to her.

A few glasses of wine and a delicious piece of tiramisu later, we headed back to our hotel.

"What floor are you?" I asked her as we got into the elevator.

"Fourth, room 427; you?" She asked looking at me.

"Third. Let me walk you to your room?" I asked her trying not to sound creepy. "For safety of course" I added . Smooth Kes, real smooth.

"Sure." She said as we rode the elevator up to the fourth floor. We stopped at her door and she unlocked her door then turned to me. "Well...goodnight." She said smiling standing in the doorway.

The moment felt right, an unspoken understanding between us. I leaned in to her lips, she leaned up. Our lips not even an inch apart. That's when it happened. I hear the song Batter Up blaring from a phone.

"I ummm, I have to take this." She said grabbing her phone. "goodnight Kes" she said with a grin.


	3. Chapter 3

Dawn's point of View-

My first NHL game and where was I? The trainer's room. Just as I suspected. It's not even like I cos do anything there. At least at the home rink I could take inventory or do some towels or something. Here I was bored, bored, bored. The game was on a monitor. It was the middle of the second period and the boys were down 2-1 to the Sharks. I had left the room to go to the washroom when all of a sudden I heard Mike the head trainer yelling down the hallway.

"Dawn! Kes is down!" Dave one of the assistant trainers called to me. "He hit his head" he said to me with a lot of worry in his voice.

"Oh shit" I said in a whispered voice furiously clearing off the closest table. "Loss of consciousness? Blood?" I asked curiously.

"He's awake but groggy. He'll need a cat scan." Dave said. "Rock, paper, scissors who has to go to the hospital?" He asked me. I wondered how he could be so calm. I suppose after years in the league that happens. Kes was wheeled down the hall on a stretcher.

"I'll go." I said as I grabbed my coat and purse. Dave had busied himself grabbing Ryan's personal effects so that they didn't get lost in the shuffle. He handed them to me. Climbing into the back of the ambulance was a little frightening. Kes was awake but looked very unaware of his surroundings. A paramedic took his vitals and asked me to quiz him on some questions that both Kes and I would know the answers to.

"What is your name?" I asked.

"Rrrryyyyaaannnn Kesssssssler" he slowly slured.

"Do you know where you are?"

"An ambulance? Come on ask me something harder." He said slowly.

"What's your wife's name?"

"You should know your own name baby." He said and smiled.

"I'm not Andrea. Ryan can you see ok?" I asked concerned.

"I'm kidding. I just wish you were my wife" he said with a grin.

"He's fine" I said stone coldly to the paramedic who was in stitches by now.

One cat scan and a few rounds of pain medication later the doctor came back in.

"Mrs. Kesler?" He asked looking at the chart.

"Oh no, I'm his team's trainer." I said with a worried look. "Dawn Jennings."

"Well Ms. Jennings, Mr. Kesler has suffered a minor concussion." He said "He will need to stay with us until tomorrow night but he can't fly for another three or four days."

"Three or four days? But we have a flight leaving tomorrow for a game on Saturday" I said. It was probably foolish of me to say seeing as I knew just how delicate concussions were. "Somebody will have to stay with him I'm guessing?" I asked as Ryan slept comfortably, like a baby lightly snoring.

"That is something I'm sure you can figure out." The doctor said. "There's some people waiting for you in the waiting area. Maybe you should let him rest and go see them."

I followed out to the waiting room to see Kevin Bieksa and Chris Higgins waiting, still in their post game suits.

"Dawnie," Chris said "how is he?"

"Mild concussion. He can be discharged tomorrow. He's going to have to stick around though for a bit, no flying or really much of anything but rest." I said looking at be concern in his eyes.

"I called Andrea," said Kevin. "She's worried sick. She wants to know who'll be looking after him and when he can come home."

"I'm volunteering to stay. I'm the most expendable." I said sitting down on a couch nearby stroking my forehead. I was getting a headache that was probably almost as bad as Ryan's.

"Oh boy, Andrea's gonna love that one." Kev said shaking his head with a laugh.

"Hey, it's up to him what he tells her who is nursing him back to health" I said holding my hands up in the air in surrender.

"But what about your fiancé?" Chris asked. "What will he think?"

"Well I think..." I started "I think he will get over it." I said pulling my phone from my purse. " I'm gonna give him a call right now. I'll be back" I said.

In truth I was thinking how I could avoid saying anything. This was not going to go well from what I could foresee. I dialed the number praying for a machine. One ring...two...three...

"Hey babe" his voice rang through the speaker 'damn' I thought. "I miss you."

"Well I miss you too but you may have to miss me a little longer." I said gritting my teeth in anxiety. "Did you see Kesler's injury tonight?" I asked.

"Yeah, looked pretty rough. How us he?" Brett asked sounding concerned.

"Mild concussion. But you know nothing. I shouldn't even be telling you. But I will have to stay for a few days until he's cleared to fly." I said worried for an outburst. Brett didn't have the easiest temper.

"Oh" was all he said. Then there was an uncomfortable pause. "Promise me something?" He asked.

"Anything babe." I said genuinely.

"Stay in your own bed." He said to me with a serious voice. "I trust you, but not him." He added.

"Brett, we have been through this" I said putting a hand over my forehead. "I'll call you later tonight. I love you." I said and hung up.

Ryan was released the following day at 6pm. The rest of the guys had already left for home. I was to stay in a hotel with Kes for three days until he could be cleared to fly. We were given a suite to share. He got the master bedroom, a king sized bed, tv and chair in his room while I stayed out in the living room area on a pull out couch with my own tv as well as faux fireplace.

"Here we are my dear, the honeymoon suite." He said opening the door as I brought our bags in. At least he hadn't lost his sense of humour.

"Ok, into bed mister." I said walking into the bedroom drawing heavy blackout drapes to help with his headache. "And no tv" I said stealing the remote before he had a chance to protest.

"Yes mom!" He said rolling his eyes. "Ow, that hurt." He said rubbing his forehead.

"Then don't roll your eyes dumbass" I said laughing at him. "I'll let you change." I said as I sat on the couch catching up on business emails. It was a rather small suite, I'd had dorm rooms bigger believe it or not. Such a shame to be stuck indoors in California. I'd gotten a text from Chris asking how Brett had taken things. 'As well as can be expected' thought to myself before replying saying he'd get over it. I had just slipped into a pair of lulu lemon pants and a blue racer back tank top when I heard Kes call from  
The other room.

"Dawn? Could you come here?" He asked.

"As long as you're decent Kes." I said opening the door. He was laying across his bed diagonally his head buried in his hands.

"Could you rub my back?" He asked. "My headache is really bad and I can't take anymore meds yet right?"

"Not for..." I leaned over and checked the clock "two more hours. I'll rub, you try and sleep." I said getting comfortable on the bed, Brett's words haunting me in my head. But this was my job, I wasn't doing anything unprofessional, was I?

"Can you unplug the clock? And maybe turn off my cell?" He said. "The Light bothers me" he added.

Unplugging the clock i asked "what if somebody needs to get a hold of you?"

"Anybody important knows to call you." He said. "Except for Andrea. She was told to call management." He said with a grin. "I love her, but part of what makes our marriage work is time and space apart." He added as I placed my hands at the base of his neck rubbing. "You have very soft hands." He said to me as I continued to rub up and down his spine. "Not like the other therapists." He added. "But then again you also have boobs" he added.

I laughed and thanked him. "You should try and sleep now." I said getting up from the bed.

"Dawn...stay" he said turning over.

"Ryan, I promised my fiancé I'd"

"Stay" he interrupted me as he sat up moving closer to me.

"This really isn't professional." I said as he covered my hand with his.

"Stay." He said his face inches from mine.

"Alright." I said settling against the pillow as he laid his head on my abdomen.

"I won't tell if you won't." He said to me placing a hand on my stomach.

"Deal" I said running a hand into his crazy hair.

I had just signed my deal with the devil.


	4. Chapter 4

-  
Kes POV  
-

Things with Dawn had fallen into a comfortable routine. Get up, have breakfast in the dark. Rest, have lunch in the dark, rest more, then dinner again in the dark. She would read books to me, make up stories. Anything to keep me entertained. I was lucky. She was fun. The fact  
that she was gorgeous didn't hurt either. She could've been ugly as we were in the dark but knowing l was with a perfect 10, even better.

She drove to the hospital in a rental car that the team looked after for us. I wore my glasses as it hurt to put my contacts in.

We had been so close the past few days. She had kissed me. Twice. The first one almost felt like a mistake. Waking up next to each other she simply said good morning, leaned over and kissed me. She didn't apologize, I didn't want her to anyhow. The second time was all me. I had been talking to Higgy and Bieksa after a game, Higgy told me to give her a kiss for him. He didn't think I'd do it the bastard. But sure enough after I hung up the phone, sat next to her on the couch in the suite's living area and kissed the hell out of her. No words, no explanation. I just did it.

"So what do you think the doctor is going to say?" She asked as she pulled into a parking spot as we both exited the car.

"He'll clear me for light contact." I said with a cocky grin. "Let's make this fun." I said. She raised an eyebrow encouraging me to go on. "If he clears me, we celebrate tonight." I said running a finger down her spine. "I give you a night you'll never forget. And what happens in San Jose stays in San Jose." I whispered in her ear.

I could tell she was contemplating the offer. Perhaps she felt like calling my bluff. Perhaps she wanted me as much as I wanted her.

"Alright." She said with a grin. A glint of mischief was in her eye. We shook on it and went in to the doctor's office.

"I swear they make you wait this long on purpose. They're making 6 figures so what do they care making somebody wait a while?" I said sitting on an examination table feeling jittery and nervous.

"Says the thirty million dollar man." Dawn said laughing. "Relax Kes. It's one of two outcomes. He says no, we go home and you get more time to rest up. He says yes you get to go home and get back to playing with your guys." She smiled.

"And play with you." I said with my most devious smile on. Something told me that even if I wasn't cleared to play I'd still be getting some action tonight. She stepped closer to me and ran her fingers through a section of my untamed hair looking deep into my eyes. The doctor entered the office and we jumped apart like two horny teenagers caught by mom and dad.

The doctor put me through a battery of tests. After a gruelling hour or so what I heard was music to my ears. I could go home and start to skate again. I had to be cleared by the Canucks doctor before playing again but I was excited just to skate again. I practically ran out of the office and almost back to the hotel until I realized how I didn't know where I was.

Once back at the hotel I could barely contain myself. I nearly pressed the stop elevator button three times. After entering the hotel room Dawn surprised me. She pushed me against the wall and gave me the hottest, sexiest kiss I've ever had in my life. She soon pushed me on the bed removing my shirt reaching for the buckle on my jeans. After helping her clothes off we resumed kissing.

Both naked we took a moment to look at eachother's bodies appreciating the view. After coaxing me back down to the bed with kisses on my neck my head spun. Id this was post concussion symptoms I didn't care. My hands went to her breasts tweaking her nipples back and forth as she continued her assault of my body with kisses. Sliding a finger over her slit I could feel that she was as ready for this as I was.

"Ready baby?" I asked as she let out a very breathy yes. It felt so good to release the sexual tension that I had felt from day one of meeting her. Her beautiful mouth covering my body with kisses. I slid myself in her hearing her moan as she adjusted to my size. It was a tight squeeze but felt so right.

Bit by bit I sped up feeling her body wrap itself around me. We were both careful not to leave any marks on one another. Neither one of us needed that. The tight squeeze meant I wasn't about to last very long. Between her lips on my skin, our hands everywhere, and her soft moan in my ear I felt like I was floating. Floating on a cloud somewhere in heaven where everybody has amazing sex with a goddess who was a natural 10 in all ways. Her hips met me thrust for thrust. I pulled back for a moment pushing myself in a push-up position.

"Something wrong?" Dawn asked me looking confused.

"No, nothing." I whispered smiling. "I just wanted to remember this moment. Just to savour how you look, how you feel. I may never feel it again." And there it was. The rush of guilt coming over me. For both of us really. We both had spouses at home trusting our every move. Well almost trusting at least. I leaned down and kissed her commanding her mouth with my tongue.

My hips continued to thrust each one more powerful than the next. I could feel beads of sweat forming on me as our bodies danced together. It was like we were moving together as one in some sort of sacred intense dance.

Forbidden...

That's exactly what this was in every way. She could lose her job, her fiancé, everything. Me? I'd likely get a slap on the wrist from management, maybe even a fine. Not to mention a week on the couch from my wife if anyone found out. I continued to thrust and could feel her walls tightening around me. A gasp came from her mouth as her back arched. I could feel a tight squeeze around my cock as she came. She cried out my name. Not Kes like she often calls me but Ryan. It was like some foreign sound that sounded amazing all at the same time. Something I'd never forget. I wasn't far off finding my release whispering her name over and over in her ear. I rolled off of her and pulled her close to my side. Kissing her forehead we sat there in silence for a moment.

"So now what?" She asked me. Ah yes, the inevitable. We had an issue that as much as the other didn't want to touch we had to.

"Well," I started "we go home tomorrow and never speak of this again." I said suddenly realizing just how sad that was. I had just had some of the most amazing sex of my life and I couldn't even tell anyone. "I'd say we forget it ever happened but I know I can't do that." I said pulling her closer kissing her shoulder.

"We have to end this here." She agreed with me. "I don't see myself forgetting this either." She said turning to look me in the eye. "Ever"

It was that easy. We were able to fool ourselves thinking it was that easy. One night stand. Our dirty secret that we could only subtly hint at. A wink here, a nod there. The odd touch here and there. We continued to sit in silence. I had resolved that nobody would ever find out. Ever.

"I need a shower." Dawn said getting up from the bed. I watched her retreating form head to the bathroom tattooing it on my mind. I suddenly realized that I could do a lot more now. Tv, my phone, I could work out again. I grabbed my iPhone and turned it on. A flood of texts and emails came in. One in particular from my best friend, Kevin Bieksa aka Juice.

Juice: hey man, miss you hope you are ok. How's life with our fave trainer?

I smiled, if only he knew. Could he know? I thought. Surely Juice wouldn't tell.

SuperKes: great man, coming home tomorrow. Was just cleared today. Just finished celebrating.

Juice: celebrating?

SuperKes: yep

Juice: details?

He took the bait... He knew I was capable of it. My ego boost suddenly 12 notches.

SuperKes: another time man. See you tomorrow

This story needed to be told in person. Away from it possibly leaking out to somebody else.


	5. Chapter 5

Author's note: this chapter was inspired by the song Lips of an Angel by Hinder. The lyrics are used later in the chapter. To be honest I've been waiting to write this chapter for a while! Hope you like it. And Brett Lawrie, I'm sorry! I really am :s

Dawn's POV  
-

It had been two weeks since I had been home. Once Ryan and I got home we kind of avoided each other. He was handed over to one of the other trainers for expert care in his recovery and I was back to folding tensor bandages and stocking up aqua sonic bottles for ultrasounds. When I got home from California Brett had gone away on a boys trip to Las Vegas. From there he went to his house in Arizona. I hadn't seen him in over 3 weeks and was aching to have him home.

I was in the trainer's room folding towels when David Booth entered.

"Dawn could you look at my back before practice? The other guys seem busy and I don't want to bother them." He said shyly with his megawatt smile.

"Sure. Hop up." I said with a smile patting the table next to me. He laid down with his shirt off while I went to work finding knots and tender spots on him. I wasn't an RMT but I was glad to help out where I could. "You're tense Boothy, everything alright?" I asked him with a furrowed brow as he turned his head to the side and looked at me.

"Slept on my couch last night. I had a bad date and didn't feel much like going to bed." He said embarrassed.

"Come on l, couldn't have been that bad." I said to him digging into his spine a bit with my elbow.

"I took a vegan to a steakhouse." He said blankly. "I don't know if she was more disgusted with me or with my meal." He said shaking his head as best he could.

"Oh Boothy, that would be bad." Dawn said trying to stifle a giggle. "I'm sorry." She said with a sympathetic smile.

"It's ok. I just need to pay a bit more attention when picking up girls I guess." He said as he moaned against the pressure of my hands working at him. "Hey Dawn you like steak right?"

"Yes, and I also like my fiancé." I said grinning flashing my engagement ring. I knew where this was going. "But I'm sure he'd love to come to dinner with us."

"I'm kind of scared of him." Boothy said "all of those tattoos kind of scare me."

"I don't know I think that they're hot.  
Plus he does have a bible verse on his arm. Surely you can relate to that" I said patting his shoulders encouraging him to get up. "Speaking of which he's coming home tonight."

"You don't sound that excited." He said hopping off the table putting his shirt back on.

"I am I'm just tired." I said covering up my emotions. "It's kind of weird sleeping alone again after two weeks."

"You mean three." He ado correcting me.

"Yeah three I guess it has been three." I said as he seemed to believe it was simply a slip up. I felt a pair of hands cover my face and a familiar scent

"Surprise." The low voice said into my ear. I felt my spine shiver knowing who it was but not expecting him so soon.

"Brett!" I said turning around and embracing him giving him a kiss at the same time. "I wasn't expecting you until later." His flight wasn't scheduled until 9:30 that evening. I was just glad it wasn't Kes that I was with.

"I know, I came home early, they've been expecting some bad weather to come through so I took an earlier flight." He said stroking my shoulder. "Any way you can get out of the game tonight?" He asked me looking hopeful with almost puppydog like eyes.

"I don't know, I missed so much being away with Kes and all." I said.

"Kes? You call him Kes?" Brett asked eyes widened. I looked around for David who had already left the room. I was hoping for some backup that everybody called him Kes.

"We all do Brett." I said seriously trying to scale down his temper.

"I'll umm, I'll meet you at home." He said to me kissing my forehead. "Don't be late."

That night I had come home right after the game. Brett had texted me on the way home saying that he was excited to have me home. I was too after all of this time albeit a bit nervous.

"Babe, I'm home." I said laying the keys down on the kitchen table. "Babe?" I called again searching for him. I finally found him on the sofa surrounded by what looked like at least half a two four as well as a shot glass and Jäger.

"So you've finally decided to come home Dawn." He said to me.

"Brett it's 10 o'clock. It's hardly late." I said with a mocking laugh. "Looks like you've had quite a night though." I said picking up the empties. Brett stood up towering over me.

"So how about showing me how much you missed me." He said swaying due to his drunkenness. He leaned on my shoulders and almost fell foreword.

"Brett you're drunk. Let's go to bed." I said turning towards the bedroom. Once I got there he pushed me down from behind turning me around. He yanked my pants and thong down in one swoop placing his fingers on my clit rubbing it. He kissed me again with force as I tried to wriggle free. "Brett no!" I said as he held me down with one hand and used the other to push his own pants down.

His voice mocked me back "Brett no!" He laughed "woman you've never said no to me in your life. Are you really starting now?" He asked as he peppered sloppy, drunk kisses down my neck ripping my breasts from my shirt and bra. He fondled me roughly with his mouth and hands before pushing his considerable girth in me. "Honey your lips say no but your wet pussy says yes." He said pumping in and out.

Sure we had played games in the past, a little s&m never hurt anyone. But this was beyond that. Not once had I said yes. Brett's strong hands held my shoulders down strongly on the bed, I was sure to have bruises tomorrow. I waited for him to finish. He rolled off of me before kissing my forehead.

"Night Dawn." His naked form told me. I laid there in the dark waiting until he was asleep enough to sneak out of bed. After an hour I was able to sneak into the shower. I tried to scrub myself clean feeling dirty. Dirty and guilty. This time was so different from being with Ryan. This was one sided and selfish. My tears flowed like rain as I collapsed into a heap as the warm shower beat down on my broken body. I could only think of one thing to do. One person to talk to.

-  
Kes POV  
-

I had just finished making love to Andrea, my wife when my phone rang. It was nearly 1am. I saw the name Dawn flash on the screen with a picture of her in her Canucks shirt smiling back at me. She couldn't be calling for a booty call. It wouldn't make sense for her just checking up either. Something had to be wrong.

"Be right back."I whispered to Andrea kissing her forehead grabbing my sleep pants and phone heading to my man cave to take the call. I missed the first round of rings, luckily she called a second time. I answered. "Honey, why are you calling me so late? It's kinda hard to talk right now."

"I'm sorry." Her voice sobbed into the phone "I just needed to talk to you." Her breath was heavy with tears I could tell. "I can't really hear you."

"Honey, why are you crying, is everything okay? I gotta whisper 'cause I can't be too loud" I said settling into my leather recliner.

"It's Brett." She sobbed. "He was drunk...and...and he forced himself on me tonight." She said more tears falling.

"Oh god, I'm so sorry honey." I said to her. "I can't believe he did that to you." I didn't know what to say at that point.

"I just I didn't know what to do. Even thinking of you didn't help." She said tearfully.

"Well, my girl's in the next room  
Sometimes I wish she was you  
I guess we never really moved on." I said to her wishing I could hold her and help her feel better.

"Ryan, we can't. We promised Ryan." She said "no matter how much I want you too Ryan."

"It's really good to hear your voice saying my name  
It sounds so sweet  
Coming from the lips of an angel  
Hearing those words - it makes me weak" I admitted to her. The sound of my name rolling off of her lips like the time she cried it out in ecstasy.

"I can't stop thinking about you. It's almost like I was being punished tonight for that." She said.

"Don't ever say that." I said strongly. "And, yes, I've dreamt of you too  
And does he know you're talking to me? Will it start a fight?"

"No, he's asleep. I made sure of that." She said to me. "What about Andrea?"

"No l don't think that she has a clue." I said with a mock laugh. "I just want to kill that guy."

"Ryan don't. I shouldn't even be talking to you about this. No matter how badly I wish this call could go on forever." She said with a small laugh.

"I know. And I never wanna say goodbye But, girl, you make it hard to be faithful." I said to her.

"I should go. Goodnight Ryan." The phone died and I paused a minute before going back to my bedroom, to my marital bed.

"Babe, who was that?" Andrea asked sleepily.

"Oh nobody important. Just Juice. He couldn't sleep." I said as I lied.


	6. Chapter 6

I had managed to make it in to work the next day. I went to my usual duties. I managed to hide my bruises on my arms and shoulders with my shirt. I secretly vowed that I'd never tell anyone else other than Kes what happened. When I got up that morning Brett was still sleeping off his likely painful hangover. I gave him a kiss on the forehead and left some Advil and a Gatorade beside him on the bedside table. I wanted to forgive him, but at the same time I wanted to get away from him.

Standing in the trainers room I washed my hands clean never feeling clean enough. Brett's voice haunted me. His words taunting and I could still feel his shoulders pushing me down. I heard a door open and turned to see the cause of it.

"Higgy," I smiled avoiding my tears. "Please, come in." I said wiping my face so no tears were visible. "What's up?" I asked him.

"You're early this morning."  
He said hopping up on the trainer's table. "Is everything alright Dawnie?" He asked giving a suspicious look.

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine." I said putting on a fake smile. "What can I help with?"

"Oh umm, it's my left ankle. I rolled  
It yesterday and thought it could use a little therapy." He said taking his sneakers off.

"Sure." I smiled taking the ankle into my hands. I felt around the tendons noticing a bit of inflammation. "Let me get you a neuromod." I said "ankles are my specialty." I added with a wink. As I leaned down to grab a bottle of aqua sonic my shirt slipped down my shoulder.

"Woah, Dawnie, what is that?" He asked putting his finger over one of my purple and blue bruises.

"It's nothing" I said pulling my sleeve up ignoring him.

"Dawnie, that's not nothing." Chris said looking into my eyes seriously. "Who did this to you Dawnie? Was it...was it one of our guys? Because if it was I'll kill whoever it was!" Chris said angrily.

"No Chris." I said shaking my head. "It was just an accident." I said avoiding his probing stare. He was too smart for me, he knew better.

"Dawn, you need to tell somebody." He said placing a hand over mine. "Whoever did this to you will do it again."

"Chris, it was just some rough sex ok? You don't need to worry about me." I tried to shake the subject but he kept probing.

"Listen Dawnie, I know about domestic violence. My brother is a cop, my dad is a firefighter. I've heard all about these situations." He said with concern in his eyes. "All I can say is whoever did this to you doesn't deserve you. I would never hit a woman, ever!" He said as my tears started to form.

"He was drunk." I said wiping a tear from my eye. "It's...it's never happened before." My tears became a waterfall.

"Oh Dawnie, I'm sorry." He said taking me into his massive arms and sheltering me like a father would do for his little girl. It was like he wanted to protect me from the world. "If there's anything I can do for you. Anything. Just let me know ok?"

"Yeah." I said between sobs.

"Promise me you won't let him get away with this. Promise?" He asked tilting my head to look into my eyes.

"Everything ok in here?" Kevin Bieksa had interrupted our private moment.

"Yeah Kev, fine" I said with my biggest beauty queen smile. Kev gave a knowing smile. He knew something was up. Perhaps not what he thought it was but somehow he still knew.

"I'll be back." Chris said with a meaningful look in his eyes. "Don't go anywhere." He added as he shut the door to the trainer's room.

"So you and Kes huh?" Kevin said with a lopsided grin.

"I...I don't know what you're talking about." I said brushing a stray lock of hair behinds ears swallowing hard.

"It's a good thing your not an actress Dawn, you kinda suck at it." Kev laughed at his own joke. "I know something happened with you and Kes. It doesn't take an idiot to see the way he looks at you."

"What do you mean?" I asked. Did Ryan say something? Was our cover blown? Or perhaps Kev was just fishing.

"He's all google eyes at you whenever you come into the room. I Even made fun of Boothy for having a hard on after a rub down the other day and he didn't even laugh!" Kev said. "He just reminded me that you're an engaged woman."

"So?" I asked him

"So Kes never does that! He's the biggest womanizer on the team!" Kev said grabbing a roll of athletic tape and taping his wrist. "Just trust me on this one. He must really like you, it's almost like he respects you."

"Oh." That was all I could say.

"But it's not like you guys could ever do anything about it. He's a married man and you're a soon to be married woman." Kev added hopping off of the table heading for the door. "But there's always one last hurrah before it's all over." He said winking as he left.

That night I went back to our home. Brett stood at the stove steaming veggies and chicken. It was the first time I had seen him since last night. My breath caught in my throat and I couldn't speak.

"Babe, you're home." He said with a smile. "Here taste this?" He asked me as I walked closer and took a bite of the veggie mix he had made. "Good right?" He asked with a smile. Like he was totally unaware of what transpired last night.

"Mmmhmmm." I said through my mouth while chewing. I swallowed hard and closed my eyes taking a breath. "Brett, do you remember last night?" I asked quietly but confidently.

"I was pretty messed up." He said not meeting my gaze. "I'm sorry." He said quietly.

"Do you...do you know what you're sorry for?" I asked stepping closer. "What do you remember?"

"I came home, started drinking.  
You didn't come home so I drank some more. I remember you coming home and then I blacked out after that." He said. I didn't know to believe him or not. This was the man I said I would spend forever with. I pulled the shoulder of my shirt down to show him my bruise. He lightly traced his fingers over it. "Fuck." He whispered. I didn't need to explain it to him. "How did I? What happened?" He asked his eyes searching mine.

"You forced yourself on me Brett. I said no and you forced yourself down on me." I said looking him stone in the eyes. He turned around grabbing a seat at the table placing his head in his hands. "Brett do you promise me that this will never happen again?" I said sitting across from him.

"Baby I don't even remember it! I swear I would never hurt you on purpose or for fun. Nothing you'd ever not want me to do." He said looking sincere. I wanted to believe him. "Please. Forgive me?" He asked. My head said no but my heart said yes.

I paused for what seemed like an eternity. My brain catapulted through several situations. But my mind wandered back to Chris. How he said there was no good excuse, how I should just leave and nobody deserved the is. How he asked me to promise I wouldn't let him get away with it. I could only think of two small words. The same small words that we were headed towards.

"I do." I said through tears. Brett got up from his seat picking me up from mine and hugged me. Would I regret this? Was he genuine? I had to give him a second chance, didn't i?


	7. Chapter 7

Kes' POV

It was the first weekend of December and it was time for the players & WAGs Christmas party. Everyone was gathered having a merry time. The drinks were flowing heavily. That's when they walked in. Dawn and Brett. I looked at the pair as they walked in eyeing Brett down. Higgy just happened to be reading my thoughts at the time.

"Think we could both take him? I'm sure there's somewhere off shore we could dump the body." He asked me with a serious look on his face. "She's way too good for him."

"Just one problem with that theory." Kevin Bieksa said taking a swig of his beer. "After finishing him off you two would go after each other." He grinned as we both gave questioning looks.

"Juice what do you mean?" I asked him.

"Oh come on! We all know about your little tryst in Cali. And Chris you've been making goo goo eyes for months now." He laughed.

"Tryst?" Chris asked. "You...you slept with her?"

"It wasn't like she didn't want it too," I said tossing back the rest of my rum and coke. "Plus Chris, what would your girl have to say about the extra time you've been spending around the trainer's room?" He asked pointing at the girl chatting with a group of WAGs.

"She's not my girlfriend, she's just a date." Chris said angrily. "But it's not as if I've taken vows with somebody else like you." He said to me. "I'd never cheat on my wife if I had one."

"Ooo this is getting good." Juice said signalling the waiter for another beer.

Suddenly we were interrupted by a very beautiful Dawn. She was wearing a sparkly gold mini dress. It looked like she could show some serious indecent exposure if she bent over.

"Boys." She said grinning. "You've met Brett." The three of us nodded politely to the heavily tattooed ball player. He nodded back, I bet he could feel the cold stares judging him because he suddenly left to grab himself and Dawn a drink.

"So Dawn, you and Kes?" Chris asked in a serious voice. I stepped on his foot to stop his next sentence.

"Kes and I what?" She asked shaking her head no. Good girl I thought to myself at the time. She suddenly looked at me for explanation.

"You and Kes really need fresh drinks." Chris said nervously he signalled a waiter.

"Thanks, but Brett is getting me one." She said confused. I excused myself from the group. I was going to get to know this Brett a little more. I walked over to him waiting in line waiting on drinks.

"Brett, so that Dawn's quite a stunner." I said nodding in her direction where she was still chatting and laughing with Juice and Chris. "She's a lot of fun to have around."

"Yeah she's quite the girl." He said in a low voice taking a sip of the beer he ordered.

"Do you ever worry about her being on the road with us guys?" I asked probing for answers.

"Nope." He said before swigging back his beer. "Because she won't cheat if she knows what's good for her." He said grabbing Dawn's drink and ordering himself another beer.

"What's good for her?" I asked as he walked away. This guy was trouble. No question. We needed to get Dawn away from him and quickly.

-  
Dawn's POV

"And then the mouse says to the elephant oh yeah, take it all bitch." Kevin finished telling his dirty joke that I've heard hundreds of times but I gave him a pity laugh anyway. "So Dawn, what did you ask for for Christmas?"

"I already have it. The love of my life." I said with a happy, contented grin. "Brett was coming up with honeymoon ideas last night. It won't be for another year or so but I think we're going to Fiji. Quiet, secluded,"

"Yeah, nobody can hear you scream for help." Higgy said looking at me in the eye.

"What does that mean Higgy?" I asked him hands on hips.

"Oh come on, you know exactly what I mean." Chris said pulling me aside from the group. "Dawn, I thought you were going to leave him. Don't you see he's no good for you?"

I looked down to my hands where my large diamond ring sad and then up into Chris' eyes. "Chris, you don't know him like I do. He's never done anything like that to me before."

"What about any other girls?" Chris asked me touching my arm. "Dawn I know an abuser when i see one. He's protective of you in a controlling way, he's already hurt you, what more do you need to see?" He asked me as he closed the gap between us. He put a finger under my chin and tilted it up towards his face. His eyes rose to look above. He knew exactly what he was doing.

"Mistletoe" he nodded upwards. "Merry Christmas Dawnie." He said as he pressed his lips into mine. The kiss was hot, searing passionate.

That's when it happened...smash


	8. Chapter 8

Kes POV  
-

"What the fuck does he think he's doing?" I heard Brett ask me. He threw his beer bottle at Chris' head. "Man that's my fiancé you kissed." He said grabbing Chris' collar pulling him back up from the position he was ducking in to hide from the shattered glass. Dawn shrieked and ran to my side. "Get her out of here." Brett called to me before Chris landed a right cross to his jaw. I didn't even look for my wife I just got Dawn to the safest place I could at that time. I took her out to my car and sat there with her as she cried. We sat in the back of my Mercedes for a good 10 minutes before we heard the sound of police sirens arrived.

"This is all my fault." Dawn said as I held her rubbing her back like a sobbing child kissing her forehead. "I never should've come here."

"Dawn I don't think that you're the problem here." I said to her "Chris was trying to get you away from him." I said turning her face to look into my eyes. "Dawn he's no good for you."

"But I don't like Chris the way that...the way that I like you." She said more tears dropping from her eyes. I shouldn't have done it, but it felt right. I put her face in my hands and kissed her softly on the mouth. It wasn't feverish or passionate, but it was a kiss I will always remember for the rest of my life.

"Dawn, in another life I would say yes in a second." I said still holding on to her face. "But you know I love Andrea and the kids. We're forbidden. We can never be." I said as my thumb wiped her tears away. "Anything else I can do for you...anything and I'll do it." A small smile spread on her face.

"Thank you." She said almost silently as she kissed me again this time a bit more passionately. Like it would be our last. I looked up and could see Dawn's fiancé being led away in handcuffs. I didn't want her to see it, she had been hurt enough lately. She didn't need to see the man she loved, or thought she loved; led away like that. We sat there for another few minutes just holding each other. God how I wanted for that moment in time just to freeze. I knew it couldn't. I still had a responsibility to my wife inside and her safety. My phone was buzzing. It was Andrea. I got out of the car telling Dawn to wait there while I talked to her. The guilt that I felt at that moment nearly killed me.

"Come on" I said to Dawn opening the door. "Brett's been arrested. Higgy too." I said sighing. "We'll get you home."

"No I should go down to the station." Dawn said quietly.

"Fuck Dawn! When are you going to give this guy up?" I asked slamming the car door shut. "He doesn't deserve you. He never will!" I said grabbing her shoulders. "You're a million times better than he is!" I held her close again suddenly not caring who saw. Even Andrea who was approaching me. "Please. For me, go home, get some things together and we will find you somewhere to stay." I said to her.

"Alright." She nodded through the tears. She kissed my cheek lightly. "Thank you."

-  
Dawn's POV  
-

"How are you feeling?" David Booth asked me as we got on the parkway to go back to my house. "Can I do anything?" He asked with a half smile.

"I don't know" I said quietly. "Pray for me?" I asked almost jokingly.

"I can absolutely do that." He said to me with a big smile.

We pulled up to the house. I asked David to wait for me, I wouldn't be very long. I threw everything that I could into my two large suitcases not caring if things were folded or even clean. The tears streamed down my cheeks. It was liberating but so hard at the same time.

Finally, I reached out kitchen table. I grabbed a pen and paper and wrote down the only thing I could think that Brett deserved to hear:

'Dear Brett,

I'm gone. I'll be back for the rest of my things later. But I think that this belongs to you...

Dawn'

With that, I took my engagement ring off and put it beside the note. I locked the door leaving my key in the mailbox and left. I was free.

Boothy helped me out with my suitcases in his car and we left what had become my prison. We drove in silence for a few minutes.

"It's over." I said quietly, almost happily, "it's all over. I left my ring." I added feeling proud of myself.

"Can I be honest?" David asked then I shook my head yes. "The whole time you were in there, I prayed for courage for you to leave him. Nobody deserves what has happened to you." He said with his blue eyes shining.

Kes had agreed to let me stay with his family until I could get myself a place. We knew it was risky, but I also knew that Kes would never allow his family to see something that would compromise them. We got to Kes' door and David helped me with my things.

"Thank you Ryan." I smiled at him as he led us to my room.

"I know you'd do the same for me." He said to me. "Why don't you walk Boothy out." He said as I set my suitcases in a corner of the room.

I walked him down to the door neither of us saying anything.

"So umm." He started nervously. "If you'd like to umm get some coffee or lunch sometime..." David said unsure of himself.

"Boothy, the body's not even cold yet. She just dumped her fiancé." Kes said giving him a playful slap on the head.

"No," I said "it's a nice idea." I smiled. "Thanks David, I'd love to. I'll see you tomorrow?" I smiled and gave him a hug and kiss on the cheek. "Thank you for being my white knight and rescuing me." I smiled honestly as we said our goodnights.

"What about me?" Kes asked " I rescued you too!" He added.

"Ryan, I will never forget what you've done for me." She said before giving me a tight hug. "Thank you." I said with a smile. "I used to think that we couldn't be friends, but Kes I think you're the best friend that I have." I said my eyes getting tearful.

"Aww." He said bringing me in for another hug. "I love you Dawn."  
He said into my hair.

"Ryan, Ryker woke up and is asking for you." Andrea said from the staircase not even blinking an eye.


	9. Chapter 9

-  
Non narrative POV  
-

It had been a couple of weeks at the Kesler house. Dawn wasn't ready to be alone so she remained with the Keslers. Dawn sat at the breakfast table with the three Kesler children Makayla, Ryker and Kinsley and their mother Andrea. Ryan was still asleep as usual. She was trying to hurry them up so that Makayla could get to school. Dawn got up and took her dishes in to the kitchen.

"Can I help?" Dawn asked as she watched Andrea load the dishwasher.

"Nope, I'm good." She said coldly. It was no secret that Andrea wasn't thrilled with having Dawn under her roof. She wouldn't have agreed to it but agreed that nobody should have to stay in an abusive situation.

"I'm not here to take him you know." She said quietly so that the children wouldn't hear.

"Listen." Andrea started leaning her hands against the sink without even turning around. "I know Ryan isn't faithful. I've known that for years. I just never expected him to move his lover in right under my nose." She said shaking her head.

"I'm not...we're not..." Dawn said unable to believe what she was hearing .

"Save it." She said turning around putting her hand out as if to tell her stop. "Just keep things away from the children. Please." It was like she had admitted defeat. "Just because you couldn't find a proper husband doesn't mean you can steal mine."

Dawn stood there in the kitchen as Andrea played super mom getting the kids ready to go. Dawn craved that feeling of having somebody to look after. Perhaps that's why she enjoyed her job so much. After she heard the door shut she walked into the livingroom and she cried. She looked down at the spot where her engagement ring would be. Brett had tried to contact her several times when he was released the day after the incident. She just ignored his pleas and went on with her life. She was thankful for a road trip to take her mind off of things.

"You packed?" A shirtless Ryan entered the living room with two cups of tea, one for him and one for Dawn. She silently thanked him as she moved over so that he could sit beside her.

"Yeah, you?" She asked sipping.

"If you call throwing a spare suit, boxers and toiletries into a bag packed then yes, yes I am." He smiled putting an arm around her.

"I umm, am going to start apartment hunting when we get back." She said looking down at her cup.

"But we get back in time for Christmas." Ryan said to her. "Are you sure you won't stay for Christmas with us?" He asked her.

"No, I'll be alright. Plus it may be fun spending the holidays in a swanky hotel." She smiled.

"It's not right." He said rubbing the back of her neck looking into her eyes.

"Look, Andrea already thinks you're cheating with me, I think that I should at least give her Christmas with the family without me." She said. "She already thinks I'm a skanky whore."

"She said that to you?" He asked pulling away looking upset.

"Not in so many words." Dawn said looking Kes in the eyes. "But I could tell how she felt."

"It just doesn't seem right, the holidays alone." He said to her. "What about your parents?" He asked.

"Christmas cruise with my sister and brother in law and the kids." She shrugged. "Really Ryan it's ok." She said as he took her hand. He pressed her knuckles to his lips.

"I'll figure something, I promise" he said before leaning in and kissing her softly on the mouth. It was completely wrong in a right way. She felt a passion that was totally different than anybody she'd been with. She knew that they couldn't continue doing this, but it felt so right.

Kes laid her down on the couch kissing her taking his hand and running it up and down her body. He slid a hand under her shirt up to her breasts that he discovered were braless. He squeezed one with a throaty growl against her mouth. She could feel him hardening against her. She wanted so desperately for him to continue. She didn't want to say no. The heat and intensity that they had together was amazing. They were passionate, soulful, hot and forbidden.

"Ryan, no. Stop." She said. "We can't, not now not again." Ryan sighed, he knew that she was right. They both wanted this but this wasn't the time.

"You're right." He said slowly getting up trying to hide his arousal. "We should get ready to go." He said as he got up and left the room.

-  
The flight to Minnesota was delayed, fog and bad weather was not a good combination. Dawn sat in the airport on her carry on suitcase as she awaited instructions on what would be happening for them next.

"Hey Dawn." David Booth said walking up to her. "You know we never did have that lunch we talked about." He smiled a nervous yet megawatt smile. "Could I buy you a coffee?" He asked her pointing his head in the direction of Starbucks.

"Yeah" Dawn smiled. "I'd like that." She said smiling as he reached a hand out to help her out then taking her bag wheeling it for her like a gentleman. He offered her his arm in a chivalrous manner which she took willingly blushing out of flattery.

As the two walked away Kevin Bieksa turned to A slightly jealous Kes.

"So what do you make of that?" Kev asked Kes nodding his head in their direction.

"Well," Kes started "he may just be the only one of us good enough for her." He said seriously. "Because I sure as hell am not." He said a bit sadly .

"Come on Kes," Kev said tapping his friend on the back. "I'll buy you a beer while we wait." He said as they walked away.


	10. Chapter 10

"So why me?" Boothie asked holding her hand as the two of them sat on the roof of his car overlooking the city. They had been dating for two months. She loved dates like this where they were just hanging out and chilling. No pretence, no pressure. "You had your choice of guys." He said to her.

Dawn shrugged her shoulders and looked into his eyes "I had done the bad boy thing, I've even done the mistress thing." She said as he looked away and swallowed deeply. He didn't want to push her, but he knew the rumours as well about her and Kes.

"Yeah...about that." He started before she cut him off.

"I had no business sleeping with Kes. Another mans wife." She said self depricatingly. "It's my fault that they almost separated." She said.

"no," he said to her. "It's Kes' fault, you were just the catalyst." He said tucking a stray blonde hair behind her ears. "That doesn't make me think any less." He said to her. "Just knowing you've learned from It makes me proud of you." He said as he leaned in to kiss her.

"If I have gained something from it it's having a best friend." She said. "Kes is always there for me if I need it or not." She said to him.

"Dawn, you're such an amazing girl." He said to her. "Come on, I'll take you home." He said. They got in the car and he drove her back to her apartment. It was small compared to what she was used to but it was home.

"Come in?" She asked him as he gave her a nervous look.

"Yeah, that sounds ok." He said as he parked in the visitors spot and they took the elevator to her floor. As soon as the door shut she put her lips to his and led him to to her bedroom. They hadn't even discussed sex in their relationship. The subject just didn't come up. They found other ways of expressing their feelings. It was beautiful, sweet, innocent. Everything her previous relationship wasn't.

Dawn ran her hands up his chest underneath his sweater. She was moving to remove it completely before he stopped her.

"Dawn...wait." David said to her in a hushed tone sitting down on the bed with her. "Dawn, before we continue I have to say something." He said turning on a lamp beside the bed so that he could see her face. "Dawn, I love you. I am absolutely in love with you." His blue eyes shone glowingly.

"I love you too David." She smiled leaning in to kiss him and continue. He placed his hands gently on her shoulders to stop her.

"But I can't do this." He said to her.

"This?" She asked confused.

"Sex." He said to her a bit embarrassed. "I'm saving it." He added.

"Oh." She said a bit surprised. "That is beautiful." She said with a smile. "So your wedding night will be the first time?" She asked him.

"Yeah." He said with a shy smile. "I mean it's more I'm waiting for the right person. It might happen before my wedding. I'll know when it's right." He blushed.

"After what I went through that is so beautiful." She said. "It makes me feel good to know that you wouldn't force it on me like Brett did." She smiled.

"Never." He said with a serious look on his face. "You're a princess and deserve to be treated like one. Your body is sacred to me." He said to her.

"Wow." She said breathless not knowing how to follow it up. "I guess it would be too much to ask if you'd just stay over and cuddle?" She asked him.

"I'd be okay with that." He smiled giving her a soft chaste kiss. "Just promise you won't take advantage of me?" He joked.

The following morning the two of them had to get David's things for their road trip that they were heading out on. They fully expected to be razzed about arriving together.

"Hey beautiful." Ryan said when they arrived giving Dawn a hug and kiss on the cheek. "So did Boothie finally seal the deal last night?" He asked her wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

"Kes!" She said with a look of shock on her face. "First off no." She said "secondly, he's saving it." She whispered.

"Boy doesn't know what he's missing." Kes joked with a smug laugh. "But with what you've been through it's probably what's best for you." He said to her. "You just be sure to call me if you can't fight your biological urges." He said with a purr.

"Kes." She said seriously. "Friends, remember?" She said with a smile.

"Yeah yeah, friends." He said with a smile. "Can't fight a guy for trying." David and Dawn had been professional about their relationship. The only reason Kes even knew was because he was practically Dawn's best friend.

"Dawnie, can we talk?" Chris asked placing a hand on her back.

"Sure Higgy." She smiled.

"So, I never had a chance did I?" He asked her with a puppy dog look in his eyes.

"Higgy." She started taking a breath. "That's not it. Honestly David asked me out first." She said to him. "I didn't expect us to work but he just works. We work." She said shrugging.

"I can't help but be disappointed." He said to her. "You're an amazing girl Dawnie." He said to her. "Just promise me..." He was cut off by Dawn

"You'll be the first to know if anything goes wrong...after Kes." She giggled. He returned her laugh

"No, that's not it." He smiled. "Promise me that if he's not good to you, ever that you'll tell me." He said to her. "I got arrested defending your honour once and I'd do it again." He smiled. "Just don't tell my dad I said that." He smiled. She laughed.

"I have a feeling that you won't have to do that with him." Dawn said smiling. "He is a great guy Chris. He treats me well."

"I'm glad." Chris said albeit slightly disappointed. "You only deserve the best." He said smiling.,!$


End file.
